I have always been timid

ok So I have always tried to lose weight and as if its some big kept secret thought "I am not going to tell anyone, so then when they see me again they'll be AMAZED at my transformation." WELL THAT DOES CRAP for my diet! I give up bc I think "ah, no one knew anyway. There is no accountability Wheres the cookie dough?" Except to myself accounatble, but SELF we are pretty good at justifying quite a bit. hehhee
SO World in the bloggerville, or for my mom whose the only regular reader I have, I am going to try again. I am even going to tell you my weight..in my toes. Approx. 4 onces there. But can't lose those so we will start with the hips, then the boobies (that'll come when I am done nursing. RIght now I am a cow-Moo! a happy cow,love getting to nurse ) Then my arms and evetually work ourselves to my tummy. Hips are easy. Once upon a time I use to be able to see my hip bone. I know it exits somewhere down there.
I feel I have to say here that my endeavor to lose weight is not one of vanity. I feel good about myself and who I am. I know I am beautiful. I say that with the confidence that I know my Father in Heaven loves me. I know my handsome husband loves me no matter what I weigh. I am confident in the body I have, but not concieded. I just know my worth, and damn it baby I am priceless!
I have always been timid- yeah right! bring it on treadmill, because I am coming and H-E-double hockey sticks- is coming with me! Few months from now I will return and report, for now stats are these....
(october 6th, 2010-approx. 204) I KNOW- I hide it so well!

ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE

Its almost midnight, I should be in bed, or at least pretending to go to bed. Today was Conference. I love getting to hear our prophet speak, I love the feeling of being edified. I love the desire I have to WANT to listen to church music. I love knowing that I am with my family for eternity. I love that their are all kinds of good hearted people in the world, no matter what faith they may be. I love that I am a mom. I love that I am happy to live in Ajo. I love that my mom and dad love when I come visit home. It will always be home. I love that I know my worth as a daughter of God. I love my Savior. I love my family. I love my husband and his family. See these are the feelings I have in my heart because of conference. LOVE. Isn't that a much nicer feeling than that of inadequency. Old scratch works hard to bring us down and make us think we aren't good enough, but guess what people... I love that I am smart enough, I am good enough and gosh darnit people like me!

slobber kisses all around

Wanna kiss!!!

Sometimes I look at her and wonder if she is really mine? Mine to keep for forever. I am so thankful to get to be a mommy. I count the best three blessings of my life every day in my prayers. I am so thankful to have this time home with them.

~I feel like she really likes me too. :)~

~She loves her bumbo seat- thank you to my good friend Carol for letting me borrow it-you rock! My three monkeys. Lauren is so good with her and helping me. Sometimes Lauren likes to wear glitter chapstick....sometimes I find Kayley covered with glitter kisses! Thomas with his signature sign-Thumbs up dude! Taken at Grandmas and Papas house in July 2010. Lauren 6, Thomas 5, and Kayley 3 mo.....this is Kayley bug at three weeks old or so.....

Here she is at 4 1/2 months old. This is her getting ready to squeal in delight face. Right before her eyes open she makes a squawk noise. And I believe for now her signature move is sticking her tongue out ALL THE TIME! Love my babes.

Mindy Gledhill - Anchor

I like this singer. Not usually into Indie music, more of a reba type gal.But this is so cute

Immense LOVE~

Tonight I came home and ranted and reved bc I had little black beetle bugs all over, annoyed. Kayley was crying, thomas was crying, even the DOG was crying. But my sweet husband just let me have my dark cloud and waited for it to pass. HE is always so good to me, even when I am a a not so fun wife to be around! He bathed the dog and took care of kiddos for me. Love him.

gggrrrr blogger- Cameras broke and I can't seem to update my background......someday

busting with JOY~

I wish my camera wasn't broke, wish I could capture in physical evidence the joys of my heart. Last night we sat around a fire in my parents back yard while Lauren curled up in a blanket on my dads lap and Thomas curled up in one on my moms lap. I came inside to feed Kayley and then heard spontaneous clapping. I walked to the window to look out onto the dark flickering shadows, to see my parents clapping and cheering on Lauren and Thomas while they "flew" around the yard pretending to be butterflies, only to run into the arms of my mom and dad and their "cocoon's." All laughing and having fun. COMPLETELY FILLS MY HEART WITH JOY. These are the moments why I make the ten hour trip to come home so often. I feel so blessed to have such fun loving parents who are still such joyful little kids at heart~